THE BATTLE OF MOTHERHOOD

This is my first post on this blog. This blog is so special for me, as it has all my emotions that have been structured in the form of posts. I love writing. I feel writing is one of those skills which is emerged from the most extreme emotions that happened in our lives. Here I write about my son who has cerebral palsy. This blog has mixed emotions, lots of hard work, lots of positive attitudes, gaining strength from weak points. And surely this blog isn't for gaining sympathy. My only motive for creating this blog is to stand up as an inspiration for few members at least so that my experience would be helpful for few mothers.



My journey as a mother has turned my life upside down. Not just as a mother, but as a daughter too. On the day my son was born my home filled with relatives and well-wishers not to share our joy but to condolence our mother's sudden demise which was really unexpected and unacceptable for all of our family members.

I was 31 weeks pregnant when I gave birth to my son. I had gestational diabetes. Two days prior to my delivery my mother was with me for the checkup. But I couldn't digest the truth that it's impossible to see my son in my mother's arms. My mother passed away with a massive heart attack at midnight, whilst my son was born in the evening hours of the same day.  it took 3 years for me to overcome the pain of my mother's loss.  I am clueless now how I raised my son with a deepened and painful emotions stuck in my heart.







My Husband's support was immense during this period. Although he was miles away when this happened he had to travel on an emergency work break. As my son was in NICU for 20 days with the critical conditions he had to collect daily my newborn son's blood reports with unknown complications. His showed a bundle of strength during this period.


My Father and my sisters have given me lots of strength and support during this period. I was depressed and very weak physically and emotionally.  Even though they were devastated just like me, their strength and subtleness raised my spirit.  I felt like the whole universe was pushing me down.  Moreover looking after a newborn baby with critical issues was like walking on the edge of a knife. 

I share my experience here as we cannot control unexpected incidents in our life and we get depressed sometimes, but we have to keep fighting. nothing is permanent in our lives. Although, it seems life is changed completely, have hope to see beautiful moments in life. I am truly glad I had few people to support me during the tough times.